The Four Agreements

There is this book I read. Years ago. "The Four Agreements" by Don Miguel Ruiz. I loved it when I first read it, but somehow what I took from it didn't stick. I often think about it - "Be impeccable with  your word", "Don't take anything personally", "Don't make assumptions", and "Always do you best". Seems pretty simple - but it's not so easy.

Like don't take anything personally...there is the obvious understanding that people will say mean things, not everyone will like you... That's just the way things are. Don't take it personally, the other persons objections really have nothing to do with you and everything to do with them.  But the kicker is, that is also means when someone adores you, loves what you've done, or praises you - it's not about you either.  It's simply because you've met some imaginary check list in their mind that has nothing to do with you.  So the bad is not personal, but neither is the good.  And that is harder to accept.  Because we all want to be loved, valued and appreciated.  The secret is to love, value and appreciate ourselves.  To stop judging ourselves, and realize we are perfect as we are - when we are ourselves.

And to be ourselves, we have to live the other three agreements.  Don't assume anything anyone does is about you. They do it for and because of themselves.
Be impeccable with your word - say what you mean and mean what you say. Always.  How many little white lies do we tell every day to others to keep them happy.  To ourselves, to make it so that we check all those little boxes on our check list of who and what we think we should be.
Always do you best - how many times have you just been good enough, when you could have done better?  How many times did you lie to yourself saying you couldn't have done things differently.

None of it is about being perfect. It's all just about being the best version of who we are here and now. And loving ourselves as we are.  Because it's in those moments when we can truly accept and love other people for who they are. Because that's really all we all want, to love and be loved.  So I agree to live the Four Agreements as best as I can.  I won't be perfect. But, I'll learn a lot, and sometime, I might learn to love who I am. All the silly and serious that is me.